Abulublog

Ramadan has come and gone. I met only a few of the resolutions that I made for myself at the beginning of the month. One of them was to dress nicely. This was inspired by my Aunt Samreen.  She told me I’d never get married dressing the way I do. I’m not sure what I was wearing the day that she told me that, probably my baggy sweatshirt. Ironically, just the other morning I was walking to work and for some reason I looked down at my outfit and laughed to myself thinking that I bet if she saw me now she’d shake her head and tell me something to that effect.  Subhanallah! No joke, just as the thought left my head, she called me. She called me across time zones, across oceans, and thousands of miles from Ramullah, Palestine at that very moment.  I answered the phone laughing and shaking my head as I turned around and went home to change.

So, I dressed more “nicely” and  I got through reading about three quarters of the Quran. Not exactly my goal, but now I have the resolution to finish the rest of it bit by bit each night. I’ll have you know that I tried my hardest to get through it all by the end of the month but I kept getting interrupted.

Last Friday I was sitting in the park reading a few chapters when a man walked up to me and asked where the Bank of America was. I told him I didn’t know after glancing around to see if it was nearby. He apparently wasn’t only interested in the Bank of America because he then proceded to ask me if I was Muslim. I nodded, that yes I was and he further inquired as to whether I was fasting or not. I told him I was, and he said, “oh, you are almost done right? A couple more weeks?” I answered that no, in fact, there were only a few more days left.

It would have been nice if the conversation had ended there, but alas, it did not. I noticed just as he began his next sentence that his entire demeanor changed. It was almost as if he said to himself in his head, ” Ok, here goes, put the smooth on, try this one out.” as he said, “So…what do you think about calling me up and celebrating your holiday with me?”

I looked up from my book…gave him a quizzical look and then proceeded to read…thinking to myself, “enough of this dressing nice thing!” But then I realized I was in my baggy sweatshirt as I had failed at that resolution when getting dressed in the morning.

He pressed on. “So…do you think you could do that? Do you think you could give me a call and we could celebrate together?” To which I replied. “No” and smiled as I went back to my book. The poor man… I think he got the “hint” then. As he turned to leave, he said the oddest thing. He pointed at me, chuckled and said, “You…you are a good girl. You are a nice lady.” I guess I passed that test.

I might have gotten a few more chapters read if not for him. But really, I’m the only one to blame when it comes to not completing all of my Ramadan resolutions. Despite this fact, I feel very satisfied with my efforts. I really had a great month. Though the days were long and I was mentally spent by the end of each one, I feel as if I tried harder to milk it for all it was worth than any other year. There are blessings in being able to organize your time more freely. When at home, you are bound by the schedule of your family, when in school, you are bound by the schedule of your syllabus. When single and living “alone”, it really becomes your own fault when you can’t find time to do the things you need to do. For example, practice for the GRE and update your blog.  Ahem…

So I spent Eid away from my family this year. I was really anxious about doing that, because it’s such a family time of year, or it should be, in my opinion. In order to chase away those invading feelings of lonliness and homesickness, I resolved to continue my family’s traditions away from home. When we were growing up each of my siblings chose a cookie recipe (mine was gingersnaps) and we made dozens and dozens of cookies and wrapped them all up and gave them as Eid gifts to all of our family friends.

So this year, on the last day of Ramadan, I ran to the store and bought some molasses and the rest of the supplies (except for ginger powder…I somehow forgot the ginger powder, you know, that powder you put in GINGER snaps?), and went home to bake a batch to give to my friends. It felt right. It felt Eid-like and it made me realize how important (to me) these little traditions are. It made me so thankful to have grown up in such an intentional family. It made me so grateful to have such great parents who thought about these things. It made me more homesick than I was before…

I got lucky though. I was invited by a friend to celebrate Eid day with a community out in Maryland. I could go on all day about them but I shouldn’t because you’ve probably stopped reading already. I think the best way to explain the community of people is like this: You know that person who is always doing doing doing? Always working to better everything for everyone. They are the first to arrive, the last to leave. They have the minivan filled with everything you could ever want or need. They are always on hand with a bandaid, or a frisbee or a magnifying glass. You know that person? Well this group was completely filled with people just like that person.

Many of them homeschooled their little blond half Iranian, half American children. Many of them had brought fresh vegetables and homemade apple crisp to the potluck brunch. Many had blasted Dawuud Wharnsby Ali and Native Deen nasheeds on their way to the community center where they held the Eid prayer. Many were still singing along as they decorated the room with prayer rugs, Eid banners and colorful cards. Many had carefully hand made a gift to give in the family gift exchange. And many had won my heart as I helped set up tables and laid out rugs with this constantly moving group of, what I felt were like-minded people.

Needless to say, I spent the entire day with them. It was the best gift I could ask for. If I couldn’t be home with my own family, this was the best second best ever. I’m so happy to have met them and I’ve already started petitioning them to all move closer to the city so I can be nearer to them and their warmth and light.

So that was my Eid. I look forward to heading home this coming weekend to spend some quality time with my real family. I already bought my item for our family gift exchange. I can’t wait to blast some DWB and Native Deen with my brother, Zeki on our road trip up to my grandparents next weekend.  It’s amazing how you can find similar people all over the world. It’s nice to know what I’m attracted to. Thanks mom… I think it’s your fault.

God willing we’ll all be able to share another great Ramadan together. May all your thoughts and prayers be answered. May your lives be blessed and may you always be happy.

Sarrah